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Men are... |
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| He does not have a
FAT BEER GUT - He's developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
FACILITY. He's not a CRAP DANCER - He's OVERLY CAUCASIAN. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS. He does not SLEEP AROUND - He's HORIZONTALLY OVER-GENEROUS. He's not BALDING - He's in FOLLICLE REGRESSION. He's not a CRADLE SNATCHER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL. He's not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He's a SWINE EMPATHIZING BIGOT. He's not afraid of COMMITMENT - He's MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED. He does not STINK - He has HYGIENE AVERSION SYNDROME. He's not a GROPING PERVERT - He suffers from COMPULSIVE HAND MOVEMENT DISORDER. He's not OBSESSED WITH TELEVISED SPORTS - He has AN ATHLETIC TELEVISUAL ADDICTION. He does not IGNORE YOU - He has ATTENTION SPAN DEFICIT DISORDER. He's not a LAZY, MESSY SLOB - He LACKS HAND-VACUUM COORDINATION. He does not tell ENDLESS, BORING, UNFUNNY JOKES - He's HUMOURLY OVER-CONFIDENT. He does not act like a TOTAL ARSE - He developes a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION. |