Reasons to be a guy

A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

Dry cleaners and hairdressers don't rob you blind.

You can go to the bathroom without a support group.

You don't have to learn to spell a new last name.

You can leave the hotel bed unmade.

You can kill your own food.

You get extra credit for the slightest of thoughtfulness.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still by your friend.

Your underwear is £5 for a three-pack.

If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

Everything on your face stays its original colour.

You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You don't have to clean your flat if the meter-reader is coming.

Car mechanics tell you to truth.

You can quietly watch a football game with your mate for hours without ever thinking: "He must be mad at me".

Same work...more pay.

Grey hair and wrinkles only add character.

Wedding dress -- £2,000. Suit hire -- £75.00

You can drop in to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.

If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.

Your pals can be trusted to never trap you with "So, notice anything different?

You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You don't have to shave below your neck.

At least a few belches are expected and tolerated.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.

You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.

Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives on December 24th, in 45 minutes.

Movie nudity is virtually always female.

You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you go.

You don't care if nobody notices your new haircut.

You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you're wearing.

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