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LAWS 2
The following laws are still on the
statute books in Britain today:
l A bed may not be
hung out of a window.
l All English males
over the age 14 are to carry out 2 or so hours of longbow
practice a week supervised by the local clergy.
l Any person found
breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end will be sentenced
to 24 hours in the village stocks.
l Any boy under the
age of 10 may not see a naked mannequin.
l Damaging the grass
is illegal.
l Excluding Sundays,
it is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and
arrow.
l It is illegal to
be drunk on Licensed Premises (in a pub or bar).
l It is illegal for
a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance.
l It is legal for a
male to urinate in public, as long it is on the rear
wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the
vehicle.
l It is illegal for
a woman to be topless in public except as a clerk in a
tropical fish store.
l London Hackney
Carriages (taxis/cabs) must carry a bale of hay and a
sack of oats.
l Mince pies can not
be eaten on Christmas day.
l Picking up
abandoned baggage is an act of terrorism.
l Placing a postage
stamp that bears the Queen (or King) upside down is
considered treason.
l It is illegal to
have sex on a parked motorcycle in London.
l Women are allowed
to bite off a man's nose if he kisses her against her
will.
l You can be fined
for wearing a tall hat at the theatre.
l It is illegal to
scatter someone's ashes if you spread them where they
could contaminate the water supply.
l It is an offence
to circle a traffic island more than three times.
l It is an offence
to let a stranger into your house to use the toilet if
you live in Scotland.
l Couples in
Birmingham can be fined £25 if they have sex "on
the steps of any church after the sun goes down".
However, the law says nothing about doing it in broad
daylight.
l A bloodhound is
the only animal in the world whose evidence is admissible
in a court of law.
l It is illegal to
take a cow along a road between the hours of 10am and
7pm, unless you have permission in advance from the
Commissioner of Police.
l It is an offence
to impersonate a Chelsea Pensioner.
l It is illegal to
show affection in public in Wales on Sundays.
l Cyclists must ring
their bells non-stop while the bike is moving.
l A pregnant woman
can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants. Even, if
she so requests, in a policeman’s helmet.
l It is illegal to
die in the Houses of Parliament.
l Section 54 of the
Metropolitan Police Act 1839 makes it an offence to carry
a plank across the pavement in London. Maximum fine:
£500.
l According to
section 33 of the 1843 London Hackney Carriages Act, the
driver of a licensed cab with its ‘For Hire’
light on is only allowed to seek trade when at a
standstill or face a £200 fine. An addition to the same
act ten years later makes it illegal for cab drivers to
take two consecutive days off ‘without just
cause’. They face a fine of £1 a day unless they
have given ten days’ notice.
l The 1839
Metropolitan Police Act, section 60, sub-section three,
says it is an offence, punishable by a £200 fine, for
anyone to dust off their doormat in the capital if
it’s done after 8am.
And around the world ....
l In Lebanon, men
are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the
animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a
male animal is punishable by death. (Like THAT makes
sense.)
l In Bahrain, a male
doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is
prohibited from looking directly at them during the
examination. He may only see their reflection in a
mirror. (Do they look different reversed?)
l Muslims are banned
from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also
applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased
must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all
times. (A brick?)
l The penalty for
masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation. (Much worse
than 'going blind!')
l There are men in
Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and
deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of
having sex for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it
is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry. (Let's just
think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the
world that even comes close to this?)
l In Hong Kong, a
betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous
husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The
husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed
in any manner desired. (Ah! Justice!)
l In Cali, Colombia,
a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first
time this happens, her mother must be in the room to
witness the act. (Makes one shudder at the thought.)
l In Santa Cruz,
Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman
and her daughter at the same time. (I presume this was a
big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)
l In Maryland, it is
illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one
exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending
machine only in places where alcoholic beverages are sold
for consumption on the premises. (Is this a great country
or what? Well,.... not as great as Guam!)
Thank you all for reading this. If you need to reach me
in the future, I'll be in Guam !!!!!!
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