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TIRED OF YOUR JOB?

Sick of working 40 hours or more each week just to feed your family?
Would you like to relax all day and still have all the benefits of a full time job?
If you answered yes to any of these questions then you should consider moving to

  ENGLAND  
The Welfare Country

If you qualify (and only working people don't) you can receive the following:

FREE HOUSING
FREE UTILITIES
FREE FOOD
FREE MEDICAL SERVICES
FREE TRANSPORTATION
FREE LEGAL SERVICES

This programme is not limited to 3 or 6 months like other countries. In England you can collect for life. Some of our families have received benefits for 2 or 3 generations. So if you would like to receive all of this without working for a living, contact the
BENEFITS AGENCY
England, the country where only suckers work


Trevor Philips, the chairman of the new Commission for Equalities and Human Rights, said the history of Britain did not properly reflect the contribution of other cultures. He wants parts of British history to be rewritten to emphasise the roles played by other races and religions like Muslims. Rewriting the country’s history would demonstrate to Britons in the 21st century how other groups apart from Anglo Saxons shaped the nation.

He told a meeting at the Labour conference, "We may need to revisit our national story. We want to rewrite that story to tell the whole story. When we talk about the Armada, it was the Turks who saved us because they held up the Armada after a request from Elizabeth I. Let’s rewrite that, so we have an ideal that brings us together so that it can bind us together in stormy times ahead in the next century." The rewriting should start with the story of how the English fleet led by Sir Francis Drake fought off the Spanish Armada in 1588, he said.

The important role played by the Muslim Turks, who delayed the sailing of the Spanish fleet so that the English ships were better prepared, had been airbrushed out of the story however. Mr Phillips, the former chairman of the Commission for Racial Equality, declined to offer any other examples of parts of British history that should be rewritten. He also said that he supported a campaign by the musician Billy Bragg for a new written constitution to define what it means to be British in the 21st century.

Mr Phillips, who was educated at Queen’s College Boys School in Guyana, also suggested that there should be a set celebration for when people were given British nationality. Nationality lessons were necessary because people were moving around the country more than ever before, providing less opportunities to integrate. Last year 6.5 million people moved house, he said. Earlier Mr Phillips said that economic migrants could be forced to make a bigger contribution to the cost of public services. (Source:
Daily Telegraph, Jun/09)


The Government has refused proper health care to many elderly citizens due to their advancing years. It is a worrying problem for many but help is at hand. Join the new free care plan today. If you are 60 years or older, you can apply. All new members will receive a gun and four bullets.

You are allowed to shoot one MP (two if you live in England ), one MEP, one councillor and just to be sure of a long sentence, someone you really don't like and think the world could do without. As part of the plan, you will leave enough evidence to make sure of being caught, and, in due course, sent to prison.

There you will get a safe centrally heated environment, three meals a day, lots of company, free TV and an assortment of games, plus, most importantly, all the health care you need!

New teeth needed? No problem. New glasses? They'll be provided. New hip, knees, kidney, lung, heart, they're all covered too. And who will pay for all of this? The same government that told you they cannot afford your current health care. And as an added bonus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay income tax anymore.

Britain, a great country or what?


Taxi drivers have been banned from wearing England football shirts or anything else backing the team's World Cup bid. Cabbies in Blackpool were told they will be stripped of their licences if they sport anything featuring the word England, the Cross of St George or the Three Lions shield. One claims he was told it might prove offensive to visitors from other parts of the UK.

The angry drivers have accused the local council, which is currently flying a flag in support of a Gay Pride event above the Town Hall, of taking political correctness to ridiculous limits. Stephen Buckley said, "This is barmy. No one will be surprised cabbies are backing the national side, they'd expect it. I've been working here for 17 years and I've not had one complaint about wearing shirts supporting England. The sooner the council backs down on this crazy ruling the better."

Mr Buckley learned of the new rule as he sat at a taxi rank. A licensing officer, whose job normally involves checking vehicles are safe, told him his T-shirt, bearing a Cross of St George, lions and the word England, was banned and served him with a notice suspending his licence. Blackpool cabbies reluctantly agreed a dress code last year which bars football shirts or clothing bearing "abusive, indecent or provocative words or images".

But Mr Buckley, whose licence was restored when he changed, said, "This wasn't a football shirt, it was just a T-shirt with England on it. I rang the licensing boss, and he said it might incite an incident with someone from Wales or Scotland. That's ridiculous. Our council is supporting a Gay Pride event yet we're not permitted to support our country - where's the logic in that?" Blackpool Town Hall is flying an internationally recognised rainbow coloured flag to support this weekend's Gay Pride event.

Trevor Boaler, secretary of Blackpool Licensed Taxi Owners' Association, said, "The council should be relaxing the rules during the World Cup." Taxi drivers in London have been told they can wear shirts backing England or any other team. Labour-controlled Blackpool council said, "The consensus among our officers is that a shirt featuring the Three Lions or the Cross of St George constitutes a football shirt, and these are not permitted." (Source:
Daily Mail, May/10)


The UK and Ireland are the worst places to live in Europe, while France is the best. Brits have fewer holidays and pay more for goods than almost all other similar countries. Our food and diesel prices are the highest and booze and fags cost above average. UK spending on health and education has plummeted and now ranks alongside Poland, the Quality of Life Index showed. Our net household income was previously the highest but this year we rank fourth with £37,172.

Brits get the third fewest hours of sunshine a year, better than only Ireland and Holland. Life expectancy is below the European average of 79.3. uSwitch.com, which organised the index, compared 16 factors in ten countries. Spokeswoman Ann Robinson said, "Last year Brits were miserable but rich. This year we're miserable and poor. Whereas some countries work to live, in the UK consumers live to work." France topped the index for the second year in a row. (Source:
The Sun, Sep/10)

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