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VERY WINDY
At the height of the gale, the Harbour Master radioed a coastguard and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff. (Source: Aberdeen Evening Express)
HAPPENS ALL THE TIME
A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guard spokesman commented, "This sort of thing is all too common". (Source: The Times)
MISPLACED LOYALTY
Mrs Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue, Boscombe, delighted the audience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled. "He'd always seemed a nice friendly chap, but when the crocuses came up in the middle of our lawn in February 1946, they spelt out 'Heil Hitler.'" (Source: Bournemouth Evening Echo)
STOLEN VAN IS A SECRET
Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like. (Source: The Guardian)
WOMAN MISSED HER BOYFRIEND
Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole salami in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing her Italian boyfriend. (Source: The Manchester Evening News)
CHARGED FOR HOUSE DESTRUCTION
Commenting on a complaint from a Mr Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, "We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's possible Mr Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house." (Source: The Daily Telegraph)
RULES IS RULES
A mum must lift her disabled three-year-old son on a school bus then follow in her car to carry him off. Kelly Alderson said council staff can’t lift Owen, who has cerebral palsy, for “health and safety reasons” on his trip to nursery. Middlesbrough workers will get training. (Source:
The Sun, Jan/08)
       

Courtney Act


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PAY DOCKED AFTER SAVING A LIFE
Firefighter Mark McCracken was docked one week's wages for taking time off to donate life-saving bone marrow to a teenage girl. He applied for special leave after being told he was a match for the leukaemia victim but fire bosses told him he would not be paid. Bosses at Lancashire Fire and Rescue Service said all requests for leave were looked at with a set of consistent criteria and Mark had been granted special leave.

The Anthony Nolan Trust, which runs a national bone marrow register to treat leukaemia, said most companies gave their employees paid leave and has reimbursed Mark's lost wages. Lancashire secretary of the FBU Steve Harman said, "It is ironic that a large part of our job is about saving lives and the lad has saved someone's life and he is being punished. If you want time off there is a special leave facility for certain situations."

He added, "The Fire Service knocked him back on paid special leave and he was given unpaid special leave. It is a very harsh decision. I was disgusted with them. I hope they will change the policy. Lots of companies give paid leave but on this occasion for some odd reason the Fire Service have chosen not to. It is very saddening. We are extremely proud and supportive of Mark but we are saddened by the service's lack of support. We are still hopeful they will overturn the decision."

Bob Wikinson, chairman of the authority, said managers did not have the authority to award paid leave but said the decision could be overturned and the matter would be discussed at the resources committee of the Fire Authority. He said, "We will look at it sympathetically. There has been some frustration because he has been docked pay. It's just the bureaucracy of local government. We will be looking at the whole issue of special leave at the resources committee meeting." Either you can or you can't, not 'you can, but only if the media pick up on it'. (Source:
Daily Mail, Mar/07)

MAN KEPT CONTACT LENSES IN FOR A YEAR
A Chinese man had to have his contact lenses surgically removed after he did not take them out for a year. Liu started to wear contact lenses a year ago and never took them out because he found it difficult. "I only have some eye drops for when they feel uncomfortable," he said. Liu recently felt his eyesight was getting worse, so he bought another pair of lenses and wore them on top of the old ones but when his eyesight still didn't improve, he took another startling decision. "I put a pair of used disposal contact lenses over the other two pairs in my eyes. By then, I was wearing three pairs of lenses," he said. By the next day, Liu's eyes had reacted badly to his DIY eyecare and he finally sought medical attention. A doctor was shocked to find the first lenses had grown into his eyes and surgery was needed to take them out. (Source:
Ananova, Mar/07)

NOT QUITE EQUAL THEN?
Prince Harry was snubbed by staff at an airbase shop after workers failed to recognise him. Harry walked into the exchange store at RAF Lakenheath in Suffolk in full Army uniform. A friend with him tried to buy an iPod but staff turned him away because he was not a US serviceman or family member at the American base. A US forces spokesman said, “The till girl didn’t recognise the Prince. Had we known he was coming we’d have arranged something with the base commander.” Why? He isn't a US serviceman or family member at the American base. (Source:
The Sun, Mar/07)

THE PRIME MINISTER'S STAFF SCREW-UP OVER GLOBAL WARMING
Ten-year-old Charlie Webster was worried about animals and the effect global warming was having on them, so he decided to write to Tony Blair about his fears for the environment. He had expected a simple acknowledgement in return but he received quite a long letter. Charlie’s reply, from No10’s Direct Communications Unit, outlined how the Government was trying to combat global warming. It went on to give hints on ways he could save energy at home and school and it ended, “Recycling rubbish is another thing we can all do as well as saving paper wherever possible. The more paper used, the more trees are cut down and the more electricity is used to process it. You could try to use recycled paper, remembering to use both sides.” The advice was put on two pages, typed on ONE side only. A Downing Street spokesman said, “We are working to step up our efforts and trying to make No10 as green as possible. But there is always room for improvement.” Mm ... a fair way to go yet then? (Source:
The Sun, Mar/07)

CAN'T SPEAK FRENCH? GOODBYE!
A would-be copper was rejected by the Met because his French wasn’t good enough. Gino Sabatino declared he was “fluent” on his application form but an assessor rated his skill level as only “conversational”, and the following day Gino was sent a letter turning him down for a place at the Met’s training college in Hendon, North London.

Mr Sabatino said, "I can’t understand why I need to be fluent in French to pound the beat in London.” But Scotland Yard said that Gino had been “dishonest” about his French speaking ability and “does not have the attributes to be a police officer”. But if your'e an ethnic and your English is crap your ok then? (Source:
The Sun, Mar/07)

"BLOODY FOREIGNERS" COST THE TAXPAYER
Long-serving magistrate, Alan Mitchell has been reprimanded after complaining about "bloody foreigners" in court. He made the remark when he was sitting as chairman of the bench at a court in Manchester. A female colleague overheard his comment and pointed out she was offended. The JP, who joined the bench in 1971, replied, "Don't talk to me about bloody foreigners. I have to travel three miles to go to a decent chip shop. Don't get me started on Rusholme and curry."

The Greater Manchester Magistrates Advisory Committee recommended that Mr Mitchell should receive a serious reprimand for his behaviour. It also urged that Mr Mitchell should be demoted from the "active list" of magistrates to the "supplemental list", a reserve list rarely called upon to sit on the bench. The matter was referred to the Office for Judicial Complaints, part of the Department for Constitutional Affairs (DCA), and then reviewed by the Lord Chancellor, Lord Falconer, and the Lord Chief Justice, Lord Phillips.

A DCA spokesman said, "The advisory committee had recommended that Mr Mitchell be transferred to the supplemental list of reserve magistrates following removal from the active bench, but there is no basis for appointing a magistrate to the supplemental list as a result of disciplinary proceedings." What happened to freedom of speech? He's entitled to complain about the invasion of this country by other people and to express it in a private conversation. The person who took offence 'overheard' it so perhaps she should stop listening to other people's conversations. (Source:
Mail on Sunday, Mar/07)

BUS ROUTES ARE AXED BECAUSE THEY ARE TOO POPULAR
Southdown PSV, which operates in Kent, Surrey and Sussex, is to axe two popular routes because they are used by too many pensioners with free passes. Executives claim the services are unprofitable, despite the company getting large annual sums of ratepayers' money to subsidise the free elderly and disabled travellers. The loss of the routes, after just one year of a four-year agreement, will leave several villages without public transport.

Surrey County Council's transport department explained the closure decision by saying, "The revenue expectations on these services is much lower than was anticipated by Southdown when they tendered for the services in spring 2006. Some of the problems relate to the introduction of the free fares for senior citizens and people with disabilities. The proportion of the total passengers now travelling free being far greater than originally estimated."

Gordon Keymer, of Tandridge district council, said, "We believe the services are vital. The district council pays £500,000 a year to Surrey County Council to provide free travel for pass-holders, so I don't know why the bus company says that they have the wrong type of passengers." Southdown PSV said, "The revenue is not coming up to our expectation." (Source:
Daily Mail, Feb/07)

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