GOOD JOB
Birmingham City Council are paying "signals
operative" Ian Smith a £71,000 salary
topped up with £15,000 "stand-by" and
£5,000 overtime bonuses, even though he has been
off sick for 12 months. His official job was just
to change street lightbulbs. |
SIGN
OF THE TIMES
Seven houses in Belsize Park, London,
have been targeted by burglars in four days. The
police response? Install notices on lamp posts
that say: "Burglars operate in this
area." Wouldn't it be more honest if they
put up signs saying 'Police do not operate in
this area'? (Source: Mail on Sunday, Nov/06) |
COUNCIL
KILLJOYS
Kids who go out carol-singing could be prosecuted
if they do it to raise money. South Norfolk
Council is considering bringing in permits for
charity collections.
Official Alex Evans said, "Failure to
produce a licence to police or a licensing
official could lead to a warning letter or
prosecution. It depends where a collection takes
place." (Source: Sunday People, Oct/06) |
ACTING
SHEEPISH
Asylum seeker Hidyat Amin, who came to
Britain from Iraq, had sex with a ewe in a farm
shed as its male partner looked on.
He was trapped by DNA evidence after his
underpants and socks were found at the scene.
Farmer Frank Davidson said, The ewe was not
very well and not very happy. A man had
been seen acting suspiciously under a full moon
and was spotted several times previously lurking
in the farmyard. On one occasion he casually
smoked a cigarette before driving off. As you do!
(Source: The Sun, Nov/06) |
TOO
POPULAR? CANCEL IT!
A Christmas lights switch-on has been
cancelled on health and safety grounds because it
is too popular. Council bosses in Scarborough
said the event had become "a victim of its
own success" and a spokesman added that
serious concerns were raised last year about
safety due to the vast crowds. Plans to manage
numbers or move to a bigger area in the town
centre could not be agreed before the event.
(Source: BBC News, Nov/06) |
|
|

Page
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7
DANGEROUS CHRISTMAS LIGHTS
Five thousand people joined a town's Christmas lights
countdown but there were no lights to switch on. They
were taken down for safety reasons a week previously
after one string of bulbs fell into the street but the
organisers had the bright idea of going ahead with the
switch-on anyway. The event in Colchester, Essex, had
been billed as the "biggest-ever parade and town
light switch-on". It included children marching
through the streets with Father Christmas, the chance to
meet Colchester United players and youngsters decorating
a tree. But as the countdown reached zero, the only
lights that flickered into action were in shop windows
and on a Christmas tree. Chris Rawlinson, of the
Colchester Town Partnership, said, "Two of the
cross-street features fell but nobody was injured. We
took them all down for safety reasons." (Source: Daily Mirror, Nov/06)
UNIFORMS
BANNED IN HARRODS
A serving Army officer was banned from entering
Harrods on Remembrance Day in case his uniform upset
other shoppers. Lieutenant Daniel Lenherr had just taken
part in a parade honouring Britain's war dead when the
London department store turned him away at the door. The
security guard told him other customers might be
intimidated by the uniform.
The store stood by their dress policy, saying,
"There is a long-standing tradition at Harrods that
would normally preclude customers who are wearing
non-civilian attire from entering the store. A lot of
people assume that somebody in uniform is either there on
official duty, which could cause them alarm, or they
assume they're a member of staff and ask them where the
lavatories are and so on." (Source: Mail on Sunday, Nov/06)
SELF-DEFENCE
US STYLE
A gunmen broke in to Guillermo Tovar's Memphis
house in the small hours of the morning. They kicked down
his front door, pointed a gun at his son's head and
demanded cash and jewellery. Tovar grabbed a sword from
underneath the couch, described as a cavalry-type sabre,
which the household used for cutting vegetation in the
garden, and confronted the burglars.
With a gun pointed at him and the intruder's finger
already on the trigger, Tovar swung the sword, cutting
the man's trigger finger off. The armed robbers fled,
forgetting to pick up the missing bit of finger. Police
were able to take a usable print from the finger, and
match it to a man who already had a criminal record. Lt.
Mickey Williams noted, "I would think he'd have a
hard time explaining how his finger got left in this
home." (Source: Metro, Nov/06)
DEAD
ON TOILET FOR TWO DAYS
A 57-year-old man was dead on a hospital toilet
for one and a half days before being discovered by staff.
The man had been admitted to Södersjukhuset's casualty
department in Stockholm suffering from pains in the chest
and abdomen. Doctors took samples from him, and decided
to keep him in overnight but when a nurse went to his bed
to give him his test results, his bed was empty and the
patient had disappeared.
Nurses assumed that the man had left the hospital, so
they discharged him. It was only nearly two days later
that the man was found in a toilet in the adjacent x-ray
department. He appeared to have gone there on his own,
locked himself in the toilet and died. Hospital
spokeswoman Ulrica Franzén said that a more thorough
search of the hospital for the man had not been judged
necessary. (Source: Daves Daily, Nov/06)
CHIP
SHOP SMELLS LIKE A CHIP SHOP
The boss of a chip shop is being probed by town
hall officials because his shop smells of fish and chips.
Environmental health staff wrote to Steve Morton to say
they were investigating an odour from the extract
ventilation system. He was told, We are
investigating a smell of fish and chips. The
council is monitoring the odours and told Steve he could
be banned from having fish and chip smells in his chippy,
which has been operating without a problem for 40 years.
A council spokesman said, We have a duty to
investigate complaints. (Source: The Sun, Nov/06)
NUDE
MAN CONCEALED A WEAPON
A naked man arrested for indecent exposure in
California was held at gunpoint on suspicion of carrying
a concealed weapon. Where would a naked man conceal a
weapon? He had a screwdriver hidden up his arse! The
police were first called in El Cerrito, California, after
reports that a naked man was masturbating in public,
lying against a tree stump. After arresting the man,
Sergeant Paul Keith was about to put him in the back of
his car, but first, he asked him if there was anything
the police should know about.
The man responded that he was concealing a screwdriver in
his anal cavity. Understandably, the police were unsure
what to do about this situation so they called the fire
brigade. Firefighters decided it was a job best left to a
hospital who would probably be the best place to extract
the item. At this point, the man offered to take out the
screwdriver himself. So, held at gunpoint in case he
tried any funny business, he removed a six-inch long
metal screwdriver wrapped in electrical tape. He was
subsequently taken to jail without explaining what the
screwdriver had been doing up there in the first place.
(Source: Metro, Nov/06)
SMOKE
BREAK BETWEEN LESSONS
Freebrough Community College has designated a
special courtyard where teenagers as young as 14 can
smoke in the hope of encouraging them to turn up to more
classes. In an experimental scheme, the youngsters are
allowed to follow relaxed school rules at the unit
including less formal dress code. They learn job skills
and vocational trades such as joinery because they are
considered disaffected or ill-suited to academic study.
Those on the 'alternative education' course are allowed
smoking breaks as long as they have a note from their
parents. (Source: Mail on Sunday, Nov/06)
CHARGED
WITH ASSAULT
A dad who dragged his teenage son out of bed to
get him to college has been charged with assault. He
grabbed the 16-year-old by the arm and hauled him up when
he ignored his mums calls at 8.15am. The angry
teenager rang police and two officers raced to his home.
They arrested the dad, locked him in a cell for six hours
then charged him with common assault and obstructing
police. Later the boy asked police to drop the case but
the Crown Prosecution Service is pressing ahead and the
father has already appeared in court. (Source: The Sun, Nov/06)
WORSE
THAN HITTING YOUR THUMB WITH A HAMMER....
August Voegl, from Jennersdorf, Austria, slipped
while working on a house and shot a four-inch nail into
his left testicle with a compressed air gun. He was
unable to extract it or pull himself away from the roof.
Emergency medics were called in to separate the man from
the roof after which he was airlifted to a nearby
hospital where he is reportedly recovering well after
surgery. (Source: Ananova, Oct/06)
|
|
|