CREDIT CARD PAYMENT

A man received a bill for his as yet unused credit card stating that he owed 񊥄0. He ignored it and threw it away. The next month he received another and threw that one away too. The following month the credit card company sent him a very nasty note stating they were going to cancel his card if he didn't send them 񊥄0 by return of post.

He called them, talked to them, they said it was a computer error and told him they'd take care of it. The following month he decided that it was about time that he tried out the troublesome credit card figuring that if there were purchases on his account it could put an end to his ridiculous predicament. However, in the first store that he produced his credit card in payment for his purchases he found that his card had been cancelled.

He called the credit card company who apologized for the computer error once again and said that they would take care of it. The next day he got a bill for 񊥄0 stating that payment was now overdue. Assuming that having spoken to the credit card company only the previous day the latest bill was yet another mistake he ignored it, trusting that the company would be as good as their word and sort the problem out.

The next month he got a bill for 񊥄0 stating that he had 10 days to pay his account or the company would have to take steps to recover the debt. Finally giving in he thought he would play the company at their own game and mailed them a cheque for 񊥄0. The computer duly processed his account and returned a statement to the effect that he now owed the credit card company nothing at all. A week later, the man's bank called him asking him what he was doing writing a cheque for 񊥄0. After a lengthy explanation the bank replied that the 񊥄0 cheque had caused their cheque processing software to fail.

The bank could not now process ANY cheques from ANY of their customers that day because the cheque for 񊥄0 was causing the computer to crash. The following month the man received a letter from the credit card company claiming that his cheque had bounced and that he now owed them 񊥄0 and unless he sent a cheque by return of post they would be taking steps to recover the debt.

LETTERS TO CUSTOMERS

A mum told how tax staff sent her a letter addressed to: "Mrs Michelle Deserves-Strangling". Michelle Stradling phoned an automated Inland Revenue line, leaving her name and address on the voice bank, to get a children's tax credit pack. Three days later, she was sent a letter with the insulting address. She said, "The more I think about it the more annoyed I become. If that letter had been sent to someone who had got out of a violent relationship this could have really set them back."

Michelle, of Yate, South Gloucestershire, added, "It's not nice to know you are giving personal information to someone who is so flippant about your affairs. When I spoke to the woman in the complaints department she didn't seem very optimistic they could find who sent out the letter. She asked me if the person I gave my details to had an accent - I had to explain it was an automated machine. They don't even know their own system."

Husband Graham was stunned when he saw the letter with the computer printed label. He said, "It's not what you expect from a Government department. It's been sent by somebody with a sad sense of humour." Inland Revenue spokesman Patrick O'Brien said, "This is completely unacceptable, the culprit will be subject to disciplinary proceedings. It's a very serious breach of staff behaviour. We are very, very sorry. The last thing we want to do is distress our customers."

Other insulting letters sent in recent months include one to pharmacist Pravin Patel, from Gloucester. He got a letter from reward points giant Nectar to: "Mr Pravin Fucking Paki". Welsh businessman Hefin Batty was sent a letter from a firm of solicitors in Kent, which began: "Dear Taffy Bastard". Val Billings, from Wolverhampton, got a letter from a bank to her late husband Mel, addressed to: "Mr Billings deceased". And a shop in Liverpool sent a bill to Elizabeth Murray, who had died of a heart attack, which began: "Dear Mrs Dead".